I push the key into the ignition, turning slowly. The car comes to life underneath my fingertips and the radio sounds.

A smile comes to my face as I relish in the feeling of being able to drive. It seems as though it has been longer than two weeks since the last time I drove, but the dust collecting on the exterior side of the window tells me time is still passing, even as my world has come to a halt.

My world seems smaller, with far more confusion and far more turmoil than the last time I pressed the gas. I can turn up the radio, change the station, and change what is allowed to enter my mind. The minute I leave the car, this certainty fades.

But I do remain certain of this:

I am not in control,

I am not responsible for the actions of others,

I am not able to change anyone other than myself,

& God will provide for all that I need.

 

I can easily rest in this.